My name is Shay, and I’m an alcoholic. I’ve said that roughly 1,500 times over the last 10 years at various AA meetings. I don’t know when I became alcoholic. I suspect it was September 1984 when I got drunk for the very first time before my first high school football game. That night was as meaningful to my life as getting married and having children.
Alcoholism happens progressively – not overnight. It stalks you over years of increased usage. But here’s the kicker – once you know, it’s often too late. The genie is out of the bottle and, well, that’s it. It’s one of a few diseases in the world that must be self-diagnosed.
So many in our community are facing unknown + challenging repercussions because of COVID-19. And the changes are only beginning. Stresses and anxieties we didn’t know we had. The pandemic is fertilizer for unspoken fears. We must cope with those fears, and coping isn’t always easy; for some, it involves alcohol.
Many of us are drinking now more than ever. Stuck at home with the kids for the past several weeks. And our spouse. Or nobody. And the need to drink, to numb, to take the edge off, is greater than ever. In late March, alcohol sales were up 55% compared to the same time a year ago and online sales increased 387% for the week ending April 11 and 441% for the week before. Coping skills in a bottle.
For me, one glass per night soon became two. Two became three. And, over the course of a few years, a bottle of wine was the norm most nights. A few nights per week, I’d open a second bottle. I’d rarely finish the second bottle, because only an alcoholic would drink two bottles of wine on a work night. Plus, I was a CEO. I couldn’t be an alcoholic. I was functioning.
Until I wasn’t.
I had a hard time controlling how much I drank, and I know my friends and family noticed. The progression was gathering steam. Regret began to build. Mistakes occurred. Anxiety increased. I tried to control my drinking. I wouldn’t start until 5 p.m. No liquor. Only one bottle. Only three nights per week. Go to bed by 10. Never more than a bottle.
But nothing worked. The progression accelerated. Anxiety was debilitating.
My life was out of control. I was miserable, couldn’t sleep, took pills, worried, and was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I knew I was an alcoholic. It was time to admit it to myself. And that’s when the healing began.
At the time, I couldn’t imagine life without alcohol. But I have found that life without alcohol is better than a life with alcohol. It’s not even close how much better it is.
Here in Greenville, we’re blessed to have FAVOR Greenville, a nationally recognized institution “whose vision is to provide people affected by substance use disorders with access to the support they need to achieve and maintain long-term recovery.” It’s not rehab; it’s personal coaching. And it’s free thanks, to generous supporters like Spinx, among unnamed others.
Out of FAVOR Greenville, came a virtual version of their model, called youturn which is a confidential library of 300 videos for families and individuals to utilize to help deal with a substance use disorder. Through education comes the ability to change. Upstate companies such as Scansource, Metromont, Table 301, C. Dan Joyner, among many others, are providing youturn’s confidential tools to their employees.
Greenville residents are compassionate. We care. And we give. As the co-founder & CEO of youturn, I enjoy a front row seat watching people give time and money in search of solutions to help those in our community struggling with substance abuse.
Note from GVLtoday: If you are experiencing stress, anxiety or depression – know that you are not alone. Our team, your community + health professionals are here to support and help you. You can view our guide for mental health resources in the Upstate here, and click the links to learn more about resources offered by FAVOR Greenville and youturn.
